You said what was on MY heart to say. The part highlighted in red is very much a central issue. In times past, when death was eminent people would often leave the clan/tribe and let the natural elements take care of things.
Many people have sacrificed their own lives on behalf of the lives of others. Was that sin?
Y'shuah could have called on legions of angels to protect him from death but he didn't. Was that sin?
Some people do commit suicide as a result of an utter lack of faith and trust in YHVH. Because THEY can't see how to make their own will change the world and people around them, they simply end the world by ending themselves. THIS is an example of utter selfishness.
Someone in my life, a family member, attempted suicide twice. She had 6 children who depended on her, but her greatest concern was her lover and HIS attitude. They'd been drinking and for some reason he decided to kill himself with his shot gun. The gun went off and so SHE decided to consume some pills in order to kill HERself. Well, instead of killing himself, he discharged the gun at the sky but she didn't know that.
The second time she tried was because of her obsession with this same man. I guess he ''didn't love her enough'' this time. In any event, lack of faith/trust in YHVH was an issue as was total selfishness. How were her children supposed to cope with that?
Attitude counts for a lot. Someone who knows that their death is just weeks/months away, who is already in horrible pain and knows its going to get worse...I just can't see that as sin. Sin is transgression of the Word of YHVH according to John and I've seen nothing in the word to indicate that when death is eminent, you are sinning against YHVH by dying.
So there are times when suicide IS sin, and times when it isn't. On the other hand, there are people who live entire lifetimes whose end is judgment. What's the difference between this one and the one who defiantly kills himself? In the end, maybe none.
Ultimately, the one thing we ALL so need to learn and understand is the Lordship, the SOVEREIGNTY of YHVH. We've GOT to come to the realization and understanding that he doesn't owe us a blessed thing. Not even the next breath. He doesn't owe us good health, good food, safe dwelling, fortune, friends, fame and he doesn't even owe us grace.
It's NOT his job to follow US around looking for every opportunity to bless us one way or another, or seeing to it that we are comfy and happy, or bowing to our will.
It is however OUR job to do exactly that regarding HIM.
Life is precious, but it's precious because every morning that we awake from our slumber is a rehearsal for the resurrection, and an opportunity to worship him by serving him in whatever way he has planned for that day. And yet, the word also says that there is a time to die. And it's appointed to humans to die once and after that, the judgment.
Dear Op, your mother didn't die because she didn't love you. I think she was attempting to spare you, her loved ones, the agony of watching her waste away so that you could grieve and get back to living again. Her time was near, she knew it, and all she did was face it and get it done and over with. That takes courage in my opinion. There are many who seek to avoid death by doing everything they can to fight against it. And yet, there is a time to die so are they rebelling against the word by trying to escape it?
One thing that angers and frustrates me to no end is false religion, or false religious teaching. So much of it sounds so logical but is so deadly to our spirits. It destroys our trust in our creator and our redeemer. No matter what mistakes we humans make, ultimately YHVH's wisdom rules. Trust that. Your mother's eternal destiny is in HIS hands and isn't a matter of your belief, society's belief systems, religious belief systems...No matter the final outcome, it will be the RIGHT outcome and if you are in HIS will, you will know that and you will be at peace with that.
Rest friend. YHVH is righteous and his wisdom is without error. It will be OK. Trust HIM and rest.
((((((((to all who grieve as a result of someone's suicide)))))))